When I first started learning about self-care, it was almost laughable how hard it was for me to even consider it as a practice. We were in crisis with post-partum depression and I was alone for a time with a newborn and a new kindergartener. I had a lot of worries for my family and for my dear, treasured, vulnerable partner who was being so brave and in so much pain. Concerns for myself were not even something I had space to be aware of let alone prioritize. My therapist would often start our sessions with, "how are you doing?" And my face would go blank. YOU GUYS, I DIDN'T KNOW HOW I WAS DOING. Even that takes awareness and an energy I did not have to expend. When you learn you're not only a perfectionist but also a care-taker in crisis, learning to validate your humanity and prioritize your needs is almost funny. It seemed so unfair of a thing to even be challenged in - like, you're kidding, right?
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